The leaves are turning

The leaves are turning, its almost Autum. The nights are getting darker. Spooks is on the telly, as is X Factor, Strictly etc etc etc

It was this time last year I was getting bigger. The anticipation was palpable, I was terrified, excited, disgustingly happy, my world was simple. I was about to have a baby. The most natural thing in the world. I was terrified about the birth- ridiculously so... but obviously very excited. I was to have my baby in early December.

Now the darker evenings, the colder weather, the Winter TV schedule have all delivered an unwelcome reminder of last year. I didn't see this coming. I don't like it. I am remembering the blissful ignorance of last Autumn and the expectation of a happy ever after - once I had got the birth over with of course!

Things like "that" -I mean when things go wrong- well they don't really happen do they? Not to people like us.... you just read about it in weekly mags... thats not real though is it...